Funny Gambling One Liners

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Aug 14, 2020 - Explore John Wendt's board 'Funny one liners' on Pinterest. See more ideas about funny, funny quotes, just for laughs. Classic Gambling and Vegas One Liner Jokes Posted on Aug 9th Jul 21st by Chuck Buzzberry Following on from our recent posts about the fun of having a crack at winning big playing casino games, bingo and poker online we have a few classic one liners for you. Funny One-Liners. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down. I went to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any. Stock Market: A popular game of chance in which moneyed speculators gamble with the nation’s economy, the object being to amass as much unearned income as possible before one’s fellow gamblers withdraw from the game and precipitate a nationwide depression. The one-liner is an age-old comedy art form. It’s humor, distilled down. Dangerfield nailed it. Mitch Hedberg and Stephen Wright, too. And one-liners are often the ideal way to get a chuckle out of kids (Did you hear the one about the guy who told his 6-year-old a long-winded joke? His kid walked away after the first 30 seconds).

The topics for this week’s puns and one liners is gambling jokes. I should add that I’m not much of a gambler; the biggest wagers I seem to make are playing 2p machines at seaside resorts, so I am far from an expert in the topic. As normal, these come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…

I make a bet with a local farmer each year as to which lamb will jump highest. I like a gambol.

Got asked to leave the casino the other night. They said I had a chip on my shoulder.

How do you become a millionaire through gambling? Start as a billionaire.

I’m going to an Abba themed poker night. The winner takes it all.

Lost money betting with with one of the big cats at the zoo. Think he was a cheetah.

Funny

Did well at strip poker the other night. I played my socks off.

I gambled on a giraffe race the other day. Mine came second. Lost by a neck. It was nowhere near.

Funny Gambling One Liners Free

I took a gamble and bought a small boat without seeing it first. It was a punt.

I used to love eating chips until I got barred from the casino.

I bet on a horse at 10-1. It didn’t come in until half past three.

Walking down the road earlier and I tripped over a sign from the local betting shop. What are the odds on that?

A friend of mine keeps insisting on skipping through flower meadows. I think he has a gamboling problem.

Funny Gambling One Liners For Men

Why are large maps rubbish at playing poker? They always fold.

Last week’s snooker jokes are here.

If you like these gambling jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

Funny Gambling One Liners Jokes

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